Simply Making Life Less Stressful
“The secret of getting ahead is getting started. The secret of getting started is breaking your complex overwhelming tasks into small, manageable tasks, and then starting on the first one.”
-Set up a simple daily Schedule
This is helpful because at any given moment there is huge number of different things one can do. Making a simple schedule breaks your day down to doing just the essential things. The simpler the better. My day is broken down to basically Meals, Work, Exercise, Meditation, Nap, TV time, and Sleep. Sometimes it differs a little, like if my daughter is going to school that day or not, but essentially it stays about the same. By organizing our days we begin to take control, and we begin to be more proactive than reactive.
-Have 5 “go-to dinners” that are easy to make
Breakfast and lunch are easy to have go-to’s for, what I get a little tripped up on are dinners. I found myself always dreading dinner time because that meant that I didn’t just have to prepare it and clean up after but I also had to figure out what I was going to make. Turns out the answer came from my extremely picky daughter. She would only eat certain dinners so my Wife and I naturally began serving her certain dinners on certain days. There was no decision that needed to be made, just it’s Friday so it’s hamburger day. My Wife and I decided to plan out go-to dinners for us, dinners that are super easy to make but also healthy. Every once in a while we’ve learned to diversify our planned meals, just so we don’t get sick of our go-to’s.
-Plan outfits in advance
In general, I fee that, this one is a lot harder for women than it is for men. Personally I don’t really even have any “outfits.” I figured out what my essential clothes were just by noticing what clothes I normally used, then I donated all of the unused clothes in my closet. I actually did this for all of my belongings, of course I never donated anything or got rid of anything until it was okayed by my Wife and Daughter. I found that it is also good to have a laundry day outfit, which I’m actually wearing today, so I know that it’s time to do my laundry. Lastly, when I need to buy something new I always get rid of the thing it is replacing.
-Have five different places you can go on outings
My Wife and I have a young daughter, so it is really important to get outside for some fresh air and sunshine. Going out and about also provides a much needed respite from our screens. We try to go out at least every other day during the week. My Wife bought a fun little bucket and we all chose five go-to outside activities and put them on pieces of paper. The pieces of paper have activities like going to the zoo or going to the beach. Then on the days that we are going on an outing our daughter picks from the bucket. It isn’t even important where we go just that we go as a family and get some fresh air and vitamin D. Saturdays are wild card days, we try to go somewhere special or somewhere we haven’t been in a while, and we try to go to Church on Sundays, but sometimes we’re just too tired. Having an outing bucket really helps because instead of racking our brains trying to figure out where to go, we make it a fun game instead.
-Have five restaurants That you can go to on special occasions
Growing up I used to spend a lot of time with my Aunt, Uncle, and Cousin. My Cousin was a couple years older than I was so my mom and I would visit them at least once a year. I grew up in a small mountain town and they lived in a huge city so it was like visiting a totally different country. They used to go out to restaurants quite a bit, but it was usually the same restaurants. They had about five of their favorite restaurants that they discovered over the years and we would alternate between. I loved always going out and eating at those restaurants, but I wondered why they would only go to those five out of all the restaurants in all of the city. It wasn’t until I got older that I learned that it can be exhausting choosing a restaurant to eat at if you have like fifty to choose from. The best thing to do is pick five of the best restaurants that everyone in the family really enjoys and just alternate between them. If it’s difficult to choose, we put the name of each one on pieces of paper and pick one from the bucket. If we want to go to a new place that we discovered in passing we put that in the bucket also. Our family loves the bucket, it makes so many decisions so much easier.
-Plan the week in advance on Sunday
I found this to be really helpful after my Wife and I got married. We had different schedules so it became important to plan our weeks out together. When our daughter was born it became really important to know who was doing what and when, so one of us was always watching our daughter. It’s also good to map out the week so that I always know what I should be doing throughout the day as well as special appointments or things that need to get taken care of. I have a planner so I can see what needs to get done and when. It took my Wife years of telling me I need to have a planner, finally, because my memory became extremely unreliable, I broke down and started using one. I’m telling you, I wish I had been using a planner all these years! My planner makes things so much easier and nothing slips through the cracks, well almost nothing. Having a planner takes all the stress off of me to remember all of my appointments, and I have a lot because I’m a disabled Veteran. It’s practically a full time job. I usually do most of my weekly planning on Sunday so I can “hit the ground running” on Monday, metaphorically that is. If you don’t have a planner I highly recommend you try it out, it takes a little getting used to, but like everything, eventually using it becomes habitual.
-Only have one TV app at one time, and have designated screen time
This tip can help with decision fatigue as well as save a little money. My Wife and I only watch TV in the evenings. We got rid of most of our TV apps to save money but it was also good because it greatly reduced the amount of options available. Options are good to a point, but when you have hundreds of them it can feel like you’re drowning in options. I’m also kind of limited with what I can watch because I have PTSD from my Military service so no action packed or thrillers for me, just documentaries, reality TV, romantic comedies, and regular comedies for me. I find it really helps to not have high standards.
-The Do, Defer, Delegate, Automate Method
I’ve adopted a simple way of getting the things done that need to get done. All day, every day we are absolutely inundated with things that need to be taken care of. As a differently capable person I’ve had to rely on tricks to get things done. I learned the do, defer, delegate, or automate method. If it takes less than three minutes I just take care of it. If it takes more planning and effort, I defer it until Saturday. If it isn’t something I’m capable of doing myself I delegate it to my Wife or daughter or I bring in a professional to take care of it. Lastly, when ever possible, I automate tasks, like paying the mortgage or paying for internet. I always have a note pad with me, so when ever I think about something that needs attention I just write it down and put it into one of the four categories. The “do, defer, delegate, or automate method” is great for overcoming stress caused from having too much to do and not knowing where to begin! This method really works. I used to always be stressed out because I was reacting to “the fires”as they popped up, but now I’m proactively making sure “the fires” don’t even start in the first place! I definitely recommend just trying it for a little while, it may just change your life!
-There’s a time for everything even spontaneity
My days are all loosely organized. Every Saturday I try to take care of my “defer” list and every Sunday my family and I plan out our week together. When my family and I want to go out and about we have “the bucket” and checklists. All of these tricks are meant to mitigate one thing and that is decision fatigue, but it’s also important to sometimes have some spontaneity in our lives. It’s a good idea to have a little wiggle room in our routines and schedules. There’s been times that my family and I have just left the house not knowing where the day would take us, and we usually end up discovering some pretty cool things and have a wonderful time doing it. I guess we could call our spontaneous days “staycation day trips,” because it’s a lot like being on vacation for a day. A mini vacation from our lives. So always remember to put a little spontaneity spark in your schedules and routines!
-Make checklists and write things down as they pop into your head
My Wife and I make checklists for everything from a “grocery list” to a “going to the zoo list” to a “hurricane list,” because when a hurricane is coming at you, you don’t want to be thinking about all the little things that need to be done. Things will inevitably be forgotten or left undone if we were to wait until the last second. Making checklists is being proactive instead of reactive, it’s much less stressful to be proactive and prepared in life. The trick is, when you have an activity that takes a lot of smaller decisions, to simplify the essentials of what is required to complete the activity. Then write it down as a checklist. It’s important to remember where all the lists are kept, we keep ours next to the refrigerator. I always have a note-taking tool on me. When I think of something valuable I immediately write it down, otherwise I’ll forget.
Minimalism is the intentional act of simplifying and taking control of our lives through keeping what is essential and letting go of what is nonessential. A little bit of extra work can save so much time and energy not trying to reinvent the wheel every time you need to go anywhere or do anything. Systems, healthy routines, checklists, and positive habits are all very important in decreasing stress and living the good life. The great thing is, all you need is a pen and some paper to start getting the chaos under control!
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